The First Great Adventure of my Life.

Well generally the last week or two has lacked excitement, just class and the lot until the last three or four days when everything happened like crazy, like I still don't really believe it happened. But let me get through a few things first that add to the story especially when I play it from the angle of me becoming a Chinese pop star.

So last week we had a party, a big celebration in the courtyard of the international students dorm, with tons of food, tons of people and a stage with skits, music, and demonstrations from various students representing there countries. It was a pretty exciting night for me and the other Americans because that was the night that 25 new students from a community college in California arrived at our school. They would be here for a month, teaching English to the Chinese students here who were pretty advanced in English already. They had already been to Korea, another city in China, and will move on to Vietnam when they are done here.

I was hanging out with new friends and eating the same old Chinese food, (which I am getting used to these days). And up on stage climbed a man with a bald head who was dressed in monks robes. He had a large monks spade, a weapon of the shaolin monastery, and proceeded to swing it around rather skillfully. This of course drew me close as I tried to get my camera at a good angle, but he finished before I could click the shutter.

When he put the staff away, he came back with two bowls. He then asked for volunteers from the audience, I jumped up as soon as my friend translated. He placed the bowl on his stomach so that it acted as a suction cup around his large belly. (when internal martial artists get very good they get large bellies as a result of many years of deep breathing that has expanded their diaphragm). He then told us to line up and all wrap our arms around the people in font of us, and when we did, he told the first person in line to grab onto the lip at the bottom of the bowl. He wrapped his fingers around the metal bowl we all started pulling, and with all our strength we couldn't pull off the bowl, in fact the bowl broke first.
[IMG]http://i78.photobucket.com/albums/j109/kungfu_sage/china/Iwantthatbowl.jpg[/IMG]

Then he pulled out another bowl, which proved more substantial, and we each took our turns at the front of the line, until I went to the front and was the only person able to break the bowl. As a reward I got the dish, which I still have now sitting on my desk.
[IMG]http://i78.photobucket.com/albums/j109/kungfu_sage/china/meandmybowlcopy.jpg[/IMG]

That was all good and fun but it mostly faded into just one more event in China. But a few days later my teacher handed me the Jinan paper, and turned a few pages, ending on the page that had a picture of me with the other guys on stage pulling on the bowl. I thought that was pretty cool, thinking how long I'd been in Portland with out my picture being in the paper. So in addition to the bowl I now have this, the first entry into the “Ian Turner Scrap Book of Chinese Fame”.
[IMG]http://i78.photobucket.com/albums/j109/kungfu_sage/china/china041.jpg[/IMG]

As it just so happened that was also the day that, as a result of my lowest score on the most recent dictation, I would be singing a song in front of the class, with a friend who's score equaled mine. A few days earlier I had bought a guitar with the money my sister gave me for my birthday, going away, Christmas gift. So we sang “Hurt” the Johnny Cash version, interesting duet with me forgetting some words and my friends thick Irish accent. At the end, my teacher, a pop music fan, clapped loudly and said “oh, very good, you now are pop stars yes”. Which I admit put the whole idea of being a Chinese star in my head.
[IMG]http://i78.photobucket.com/albums/j109/kungfu_sage/china/china034.jpg[/IMG]

A couple of days later I was coming back from the store, when I saw Ryan and Carrie, standing out side of the dorms with a woman, when they saw me they pointed me out to the woman who laughed, rubbing her hands over her mouth obviously surprised by my facial hair. When I walked up the stairs to them they filled me in on a cool opportunity, they needed some Americans to take pictures of, and some one said something about a billboard. So me needing money, still having troubles with the bank, and very interested in having my picture on a billboard in China, I agreed with Ryan to participate. It was said to be 600 kuai for a half days work.

Three days later at 6 in the morning I found my self skipping class to go to some apartment on the edge of town where I got my hair and makeup done. Very sadly I did not get a picture of my self, but I'll try and describe it. The hair was combed straight back, but blow dried like crazy so it was big and puffy, and covered in a tough shell of hair spray, and my make up made me look, well, dirty. I looked very dark, but not like I had a good tan, more like I was a homeless man just off the street. I wasn't to pleased when we left the apartment and walked around in public, though no more people stared at us than usual.

We got in a van with a crew of people none of whom spoke English so me and Ryan spoke freely about the strange presence of a video camera mixed with the tripods, and a lack of a still frame camera. We really knew nothing about what we were doing so we were a bit unprepared when the crowded van didn't pull into the final stop for 2 and a half hours. At which point we were taken to a room and Ryan was given a suit to change into. While my hair and make up made me appear to be some bum off the streets, Ryan looked like a local news anchor, a big difference from the D'nD type nerd he usually portrays. He wore a full business suit right down to the shoes, while I just hung out in my regular clothes for a while, thinking about how totally bazaar it was that I was gonna be a model in China. Eventually some one came and got us and we went to a room with a video camera set up on tracks, in a room set up like an office, and people working on computers.

This confirmed what we had feared earlier. We were not going to be on a billboard, we were shooting a commercial. This idea took us a little while to get used to, but Ryan was quickly taken to sit at a desk with 3 other people dressed as Chinese business men, I don't think there was much to Ryan's role other than “The American.” A good many takes of them shaking hands later, we were back in our room. This time though when they came back they handed me a jacket, a blue jacket that was the same as all the employees' there with the company logo stitched on it. My job was to sit in on a board meeting while the boss gave an inspirational speech to his staff, as it turns out though I was sitting in on an actual board meeting and when the cameras stopped rolling I wasn't sure if I should leave or if that would be rude, I definitely didn't want to just sit there with all the people taking notes, just looking like some dumb hobo. But the meeting ended quickly and slipped out the door with the crowd.

Again much waiting found a lady leading us out back to the the factory where they apparently assembled the cabinets and safes that they sold. Again the cameras were set up and again I found I was up to bat, still in my blue sports jacket. In this role I was to play of all things an American, but an American teaching the factory worker, the actual factory worker, how to do his job, every so often the pang of the utterly surreal would strike me as I remembered what I was doing just a few days earlier, never expecting to do anything like this.

After a few takes I was finished and they called Ryan up to film the final gripping scene, American business man walks through factory flanked by a posse of Chinese business men, surveying the factory workers and being very impressed. And at that point it was finally over. But we couldn't leave before taking pictures with a bunch of the workers, then meeting the president of the company, shaking his hand, taking a picture with him, all while dieing of hunger, thirst and forming a head ache out of the fumes from my hair.

And 3 hours later when our van finally made it into school, we were both fiercely aware of the fact that it was 9:00 pm, and it was just as dark now as when we had left this morning. It had certainly not been a few pictures and it was not a half days work, so when he were dropped off and payed we took issue with the fact that we felt we deserved more than the 600 we were given, it proved useless, I still have no skill in arguing with a Chinese person.

I don't know if or when the commercial is to be shown, but should I catch it I'll try and get a picture. In the mean time I'm practicing my guitar 4 or 5 hours a day, not really out of discipline but really only because it's the best form of procrastination I've found yet. And when I finally hit it big here in China I'll be able to play some really wicked Chinese pop music.

Ok finally just a few up dates, new job opportunity, after class today my teacher told me her friend had a daughter that was looking for a tutor to help her learn English, I don't know how much she would pay me, my teacher asked me how much I would charge and I told her I have no idea, and asked her if she knew what was normal, she said she also didn't know but a stead cash flow would be nice. The really fantastic thing about being an American in China is people just offer you jobs. Now I just need to watch my spelling when I teach.

Second I was talking with some of the Germans, and they told me that they were paying about half of what I was paying for my dorm by living in a flat out side of the school, and not only does it sound wonderful to get away from my Korean neighbors, it also would get me away from the large population of English speakers, forcing me to use my Chinese more, but I think that would be an idea for the next term.

And finally for now, I spent the evening with a Chinese friend I've made here, we had a four hour conversation about all sorts of things. I explained to here the history of American music from slavery to modern rock and roll, we talked about diversity and racism, she is a journalism major so we talked a long time about what Free Press is and that lead to discussing whether she thought she really was free in China. I found that, like with a lot of Chinese I've met, she was either just totally oblivious to the suppression in China, or she was in denial. She didn't believe me when I said that my Internet is censored so I can't get onto BBC, CNN, Wikipedia, or a number of other web sites. When I ask if she felt safe publishing something if it was anti government she just asked why she would want to write something anti government.

But she is not so entrench as most Chinese I've met and eventually I think she really did start to think about some things she hadn't before. But the most shocking thing I heard was when I was trying to explain that most Americans view the Chinese people as suppressed, and I was trying to explain the term suppressed to her, and so I said “It's like the people in North Korea, but thats an extreme example,” and she had no idea what I was talking about, she seemed to know nothing about what was going on in north Korea, the fact that they are so censored and all that, or the terrible conditions they live under. But it was a rather awesome conversation none the less, even though she sometimes felt uncomfortable with the topic she always listened and was willing to try to understand my point of view. And she actually did a pretty good job of understanding me, even when I started getting into taoist concepts when related to marriage, which lead to the theory behind taiji, topics most English speaking people I try to explain to fail to grasp, or fall asleep in the middle of. So I was impressed with that.

Ok thats China in a nut shell, theres no way I could fit everything in here, but I got the best stuff in at least, I think.

and as usual you can see pics of my adventures at photobucket.com under the profile Kungfu_sage.